I grew up with dogs, so I always just figured I was a dog person.  But in high school I started to have a really strong desire for a cat.  So strong, in fact, that I brought home a stray kitten and hid her in my bedroom for three weeks before my parents discovered her.  Their first reaction was “Oh, hell no.”  But luckily for me, it was a few weeks before my birthday, so they let me keep her as my birthday present.  And so began my conversion: I can now say with confidence, I am a cat person.

Let me just use our current dogs and cats as an example.

1. Dealing with Cat potty is so much easier.  With cats, you just set up a litter box.  With dogs, you have to take them outside to potty at least three or four times a day.  And even with that, they still potty on your floor multiple times a day. (OK, maybe that’s just our dogs.)  You might say, yeah, but you have clean out the cat’s litter box.  OK, but you also have to pick up the dog poop off the lawn, which is especially annoying in winter.  And how much fun is it to wander all over the yard, bent over, eyes scanning the ground for dog poop?  Right.  Not fun.  Cats win.

2. You have to take dogs outside.  I know I just mentioned this, but I think it bears repeating.  Because, while taking dogs outside or out for a walk in the summer is pretty fun, taking them out in the winter is pretty much terrible.  Especially when you have our dogs and you have to put coats on them to take them outside.  And then stand out in the cold while you coax them to please, for the love of god, just go potty so we can go inside.  Our cats are indoor cats, but even if your cats are outdoor cats, you just let them in and out and they take care of themselves.  So much more self-sufficient.  All around better.  Win.

3. Cats are less annoying. Cats respect your personal space.  Dogs get up in your face, demanding pets and attention and begging for food.  They jump on your legs, bark when you’re trying to get the baby to sleep, and eat food off the table.  And did I mention the peeing on the floor?  That’s super annoying.  Cats on the other hand? Calm, peaceful, soft, luxurious, graceful… I honestly can’t think of a single thing my cats do that annoys me.  Cats win again.

4. It’s so much easier to vacation/work/leave the house when you just have cats. You can leave cats alone for four days with nothing but a clean litter box, a heaping bowl of food and a full water fountain.  If you’re gone longer than that, all you need is a nice friend to come over every couple days and check on them. You can’t leave the dogs alone for more than a few hours.  When David and I were both working we had to pay someone to come take them out in the middle of the day. When we want to go out of town, we have to arrange for someone to come stay at the house with them because they can’t be boarded. Come on people, cats clearly win.

5. Don’t even give me this “cats don’t care about you” bullshit.  I know what you’re going to say.  “Yeah, but dogs love you and cats couldn’t care less.”  Not true.  My cats love me.  They may show it in different ways, but they definitely love me.  They follow me around the house, they sleep in bed with us at night, cuddled up next to me, they come over for pets every once in awhile and purr and stretch while I scratch and rub them.  Just because they’re not codependent and needy like dogs doesn’t mean they don’t love me.  In fact, I think any relationship (whether with pets or people) is better when each party has his or her own interests and independence.  That’s right, cats win.  Again.

6. Cats are less expensive.  I’m not even going to tell you the amount of money we’ve spent on these dogs in the last three years because it’s just indecent.  But let me at least list out their various health problems. Catdog: all of her teeth removed (NOT cheap), heart murmur (requiring cat-scans and ultrasounds), arthritis (requiring x-rays and various meds), slipped disks (requiring MRI, various meds, and possibly surgery), kidney failure (requiring special food and possibly meds). Steve: almost all of his teeth removed, kidney failure (requiring lots of testing and various meds and special food), bit by dog at dog park (requiring staples and meds).  Here are the cats’ health problems:       .  That’s right, none.  Cats, for the win.

OK, so let’s hear it.  Do you agree with me that cats are clearly the better pet?  Or are you a dog person?  And if so, why are dogs better?